Kaimi 29 Posted January 15, 2015 Share Posted January 15, 2015 Today I was asked "very quietly and politely" not to come back to my favorite poker room,which is only a 15 minute walk from my apt. complex, unless I changed my "attitude". Seems that a couple of players didn't think I was "really" blind. So, on Friday I have an appt. with my doctor to get a letter stating that I am "Legally blind". Guess all them "Is my blind/ante in?" and other blindman jokes were getting to them. Really? I guess if you lose three nice size pots in a $1-$4 game you tend to lose your humour. Go figure! Anyone out there have any blind man jokes I can use at the table next week when I return with my notarized letter from the doctor? Yep, I am even getting it notarized just to prove a point. Stay tuned for chapter 2 of this hilarious episode. I figured at this point in my life if I cant make people laugh and forget about their own problems then what else is there. IMUA and "I.m ALL in! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mike Furness 1,513 Posted January 15, 2015 Share Posted January 15, 2015 (edited) Ka'imi ...Sounds like you are holding all the right cards ... just keep calling their bluff ... oh and that is blind man's bluff btw! ... and taking their money! Mike F Edited January 15, 2015 by Mike Furness Quote Link to post Share on other sites
grubstake 659 Posted January 15, 2015 Share Posted January 15, 2015 I know a blind carpenter, that picked up a hammer! And SAW! Grubstake 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Au Seeker 3,153 Posted January 15, 2015 Share Posted January 15, 2015 Ka'imi,Sounds like your friends don't like to play "Blind man's bluff"!! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
garimpo 2,295 Posted January 15, 2015 Share Posted January 15, 2015 There was this Gynecologist who was slowly losing his eye site. Then one day when he was biting his finger nails he realized that he had to quit that habit because .......Sorry wrong site for that one! 3 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
weaver hillbille 488 Posted January 15, 2015 Share Posted January 15, 2015 So you're legally blind/disabled and they discriminated against you?Doesn't sound very smart on their part. Businesses have been sued for much less.........................How do you find a blind man in a nudist colony? It's not hard. Today I was asked "very quietly and politely" not to come back to my favorite poker room,which is only a 15 minute walk from my apt. complex, unless I changed my "attitude". Seems that a couple of players didn't think I was "really" blind. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
mn90403 977 Posted January 15, 2015 Share Posted January 15, 2015 Here you go ... by the way ... if you are blind, How can you read this? (Joke)http://www.bestmidi.com/jokes/short.phpA blind man is sitting on a park bench. A rabbi sits down next to him.The rabbi is chomping on a piece of matzah. Taking pity on the blindman, he breaks off a piece and gives it to the blind man.Several minutes later, the blind man turns, taps the rabbi on theshoulder, and asks, "Who wrote this crap?"Why don't blind people go skydiving?It scares the dogs.A woman was taking a bath when she heard her doorbell ring. "Who is it?" she said. "Blind man," was the answer. "I'll be right there," she said.Without putting clothes on, she went to the door. A surprised man said,"where do you want these venetian blinds?"A blind man walks into a shop with his guide dog. He puts the lead on the dog and starts swinging it round through the air by it. The shop assistant is horrified by this cruelty and runs to fetch the manager.The manager rushes up to the blind man saying: "What the hell are you doing? Put that dog down immediately." The blind man replied, "I'm only having a look around."What are the bumps around a girl's nipples?They read "suck here" in braille.What do they teach a blind gynecolegist in med school?How to read lips!!!One day I was talking to my friend, and he said, "Yep, I'm color blind to one color." Then I asked him what color was he color blind to, and he said, "I don't know. I haven't seen it yet."Marriage is love. Love is blind. Therefore, marriage is an institution for the blind.What do you call a blind rabbit sitting on your face?An unsightly facial hare!If love is blind, lingerie makes great braille.Why are bats blind?Well, you wouldn't see too good if you hung upside-down all day, would you? 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
garimpo 2,295 Posted January 15, 2015 Share Posted January 15, 2015 because he could no longer tell pink from stink! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Kaimi 29 Posted January 16, 2015 Author Share Posted January 16, 2015 Aloha guys,In my situation I am legally blind due to the fact that I have no peripheral vision. It is like looking at the world thru a toilet paper tube held up to my right eye. Sounds crappy,no pun intended, BUT it sure beats being totally blind. I thank God each day for that fact. Imua! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Hoser John 1,240 Posted January 16, 2015 Share Posted January 16, 2015 Amen Kaimi--be thankful for what works and try to ignore what don't. As I close in on 65 it's the only way to survive the horrors of aging. Between Hep C 2b,multiple cancer ops etc etc I can attest to your moxy-KUDOS and respect to ya-John Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mike Furness 1,513 Posted January 16, 2015 Share Posted January 16, 2015 So Ka'imi ... is what you have a form of age related macular degeneration? Just curious as when you said the peripheral vision is gone that is how we found my mother, may she rest in peace, had AMD, the wet variety. AMD is just the opposite of what you describe where the center of vision distorts and eventually disappears but the peripheral remains somewhat intactMike F Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Kaimi 29 Posted January 16, 2015 Author Share Posted January 16, 2015 Aloha Mike,None of the above. Had a minor stroke 9/12/12 and I lost my voice, feeling on my left side and vision in my left eye. Thank God my voice came back with a vengeance and so did most of my feeling in my arm and leg. BUT my peripheral vision on my left is gone. BUT the rest of my vision is very slowly coming back and a snails pace and for that I thank God each morning. My doctor cant explain why this is happening and I really don't care how, just that I did not end up totally blind. Everyday is a challenge I kind of take on full bore and refuse to give up. My niece says that I used to travel at 99mph all the time but I now travel at 5mph. Family! Only she could get away with a comment like that.Aloha to all the meteorite hunters I have encountered in the past and as always "Be safe out there and take care of each other!".Aloha,Stan aka Ka'imi (pronounced Ka E Me! 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mike Furness 1,513 Posted January 18, 2015 Share Posted January 18, 2015 Ka'imi ... Keep up the good work toward full vision ... whatever you and your Maker are doing is the right thing ... The Doc can only do just so much ... recovery from major medical events is sometimes unexplainable but I believe that the mental state of the individual has a lot to do with it ... So ... Keep up the positive attitude.Mike Quote Link to post Share on other sites
pondmn 264 Posted January 18, 2015 Share Posted January 18, 2015 Just let them know about the American Disabilities Act... Quote Link to post Share on other sites
azdigger 1,474 Posted January 20, 2015 Share Posted January 20, 2015 What did the Blind Man say as he walked past the TUNA BOAT........MORNIN' LADIES! 2 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
frank c 969 Posted January 20, 2015 Share Posted January 20, 2015 Stan next time you show up at the Poker tables when they start givin ya a hard time tell em yer on a blind date !!!!!! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Kaimi 29 Posted January 21, 2015 Author Share Posted January 21, 2015 Aloha guys,Well, I showed up today with my notarized letter from the Doctor and only the poker manager wanted to see it to make sure it was all legal. BOOYAH! Won a couple of good hands then lost a couple of smaller hands. In all I walked away with $368.00 during about 3 hours of play. Some of the guys just don't learn as fast as others. As far as I am concerned, it is not all about the money but being able to work my mind/brain. And if you believe that garbage then I want you to join our table. Aloha everyone and as always "Be safe out there!" Imua! 1 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Hoser John 1,240 Posted January 21, 2015 Share Posted January 21, 2015 Tenacity ya gotta jus' luv it. And thanks for the heads up as now I know who to NOT play poker against either Respect -John Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Mike Furness 1,513 Posted January 21, 2015 Share Posted January 21, 2015 What HJ said ... Not a great player myself but do appreciate time spend playing on occasion. Good friend of mine just won at the final table in Vegas last week. I've learned a lot about the game from him ... still can't come close to beating him though! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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