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elder-miner

PortaPotty

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I just use my pick to dig the hole. Less crap to carry around.

mine gets buried deep with a nickel about 4" down. If someone got a nickel for each time they dug up some crap, they'd be rich :D

You are an evil , evil man :evil1:

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I was out once and found a nickle laying on the surface. I figured that one was safe so I picked it up. John B already told me to watch out for buried nickles.

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Nickels schmickels. If'n you have never dug a schitty nickel then you are still damp behind the ears.

I am flattered that the legend lives on. It was worth the ten minutes to tell that story. A lot of guys will never feel the same about digging a coin. Betcha all look at the spoil pile every time you realize it is a nickel, huh? Ol' Bedrock got into your head didn't he??? :hahaha: :hahaha: :hahaha: :hahaha: :hahaha: :hahaha:

Homie knows how to schitt in the woods. You should spread it around, never in the same spot twice. Always on a hill and never in a watershed or creek bottom. Just dig a 6" hole, lay a shiny new alloy nickel on the bottom, and let fly. Push the dirt over it with the side of your boot and go on. (It even tells you that in the Bible! Well, all except the nickel part.)

My little camper sports a high tech porta potty. A five gallon bucket with a Wal-Mart plastic bag. You know, the ones that rip easy. Dump, tie, and deposit at the nearest Valero gas and convinience store in the trash can out on the gas island. Wash your windows while you are there and keep the squeegee.

When on your claim, dump on the surface and put a rock over the paper. It makes an obvious crapsite that people will shy away from. After a while you get a fine collection of markers with a scrap of paper under them. That area is like a little minefield of turds and is where you can hide darn near anything. Only you know the pile. Remember the "Good, Bad and the Ugly"? Just like that only with piles of schitt instead of graves.

Get the book, "How to crap in the Woods". It will unravel the mysteries of the art of defecating and is a good laugh. And learn to harness the power of crap. It is a powerful negative force that causes humans to react in a predictable manner. That is a powerful force indeed.

May the force be with you Nickleheads! :ROFL: :ROFL:

EDIT- I see the editor changed the title of the book I referenced. The book is entitled "How to Schitt in the Woods". NOT "How to CRAP in the woods". So if you Google it they spell that foul word out like it should be spelled.

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I learned the nickel part from my dad. But mine is always above the pile by a few inches and I use RV TP, so it won't last out there long. Sure does take a lot, though.

I like the nickel on bottom trick... think I'll come over to the dark side :evilgrin:

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Why waste time?

post-1755-0-02744600-1347217383.jpg

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Why waste time?

post-1755-0-02744600-1347217383.jpg

That is SOOOOOOO NOT RIGHT!

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Hey Homey, would it make it any more tempting if i stuffed a nickel in there?? :brows: :hahaha:

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LOL

There's a place in Tucson called Sir James Tavern.

Best you ask there! LOL

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I just use my pick to dig the hole. Less crap to carry around.

mine gets buried deep with a nickel about 4" down. If someone got a nickel for each time they dug up some crap, they'd be rich :D

That's meaner than stickin' a dime under someones coil cover... :D

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Bucket are those 1 lb'ers or 3 lb'ers???

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Depends have a weight limit like baby diapers?

Lemme tell ya, when they say 12-14 pounds, they're not lying!

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Bucket are those 1 lb'ers or 3 lb'ers???

Personally I'd go with the big load the 3lb' ers that way your good all day for #1 and #2. No need to slow down, no need for a pick or a #2 shovel. El D you got knee problems ...Boom...problem solved, no need to even bend over, just keep on swinging that detector with no down time, then at the end of the day just pitch it in the campfire!! Your right Homey...that is soooooo wrong!!!!!!

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suicide would be more preferential than having to "Depends"

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Depends might solve the storage problem buttt it brings about another most irritating issue- that of "Sandpaper Assssssh"-which will stop all motion. Vaseline, Desitin, Betadine/ Iodine and alcohol can get rid of the symptoms and possibly cure SA... Anti MOnkey Butt POwder can also help after the initial raw period is over. Butttt it will not work with the DEpends storing a full load! Or even a half load. They should always be unloaded or locked away in a safe place away from children!

IMportant NOte: the alcohol doesn't go on your flank, if so afflicted by SA( it will burn hotter than hell if you do!!!!!!!!!)..

It goes in at the other end.

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But when you insert grain alcohol in the correct end, it makes expulsions out the other end more frequent and changes the properties of such expulsions. A scientific phenomenon known as "beer sh*+s"

This could quickly render the fresh depends as a full depends, with the potential for a blow out.

I'll stick with nickels. new and improved and on the bottom now :evil1:

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There is nothing quite like the feeling of knowing that someone has just dug through a pile of your crap for a nickel. And if you have several in one area there is a good chance that they may do it repeatedly. It is like the gift that keeps on giving.

If I ever catch a "Depends" with the end of my pick while digging a big gonging sound I will make sure to post it. Nothing says "gotcha!" like an adult diaper in the placers, huh?

And if'n you have a backpack vacuum you really dont need the Depends. Just a tight fitting set of plastic pants and a length of duct tape will complete the plumbing. Immediate and effortless evacuation is just a pull of the starting cord away. Drop a nickel down your pants, jerk the ripcord on the mighty Echo engine and aim that exhaust into your latest exploration. It is just that simple!

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Years ago out prospecting. We were joined by some city slickers. One of which was a real know-it-all. Every time anyone raised a subject, he bragged about shooting bigger deer, elk, bear, caught bigger fish, found more gold, on & on. Hiking along, that guy had to take a dump. I watched him walk off the trail into the bushes to do so. After he did his dump, he walked back to the trail. I could not help myself. I told him you must be a real tough sumbitch. He asked why do you say that? My reply was: “because I have never in my life seen anyone intentionally wipe their ass with poison oak before“.

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Years ago out prospecting. We were joined by some city slickers. One of which was a real know-it-all. Every time anyone raised a subject, he bragged about shooting bigger deer, elk, bear, caught bigger fish, found more gold, on & on. Hiking along, that guy had to take a dump. I watched him walk off the trail into the bushes to do so. After he did his dump, he walked back to the trail. I could not help myself. I told him you must be a real tough sumbitch. He asked why do you say that? My reply was: “because I have never in my life seen anyone intentionally wipe their ass with poison oak before“.

LOL! My Dad Really Did that.

Boy O Boy was he in Hurting Status.

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:hahaha: :hahaha: :hahaha: :hahaha: :hahaha: This thread is a gas and making me roar with laughter ... and it just keeps coming ... you guys are a riot when it comes to solving a s#!&ty situation!

Mike F

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26feb20-anti-monkey-butt.jpgEverything in moderation witht teh grain alcohol.

antimonkeybutt to the rescue!!!! http://www.antimonke...<!--NoParse1-->

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I have a bottle of that under my sink in the bathroom.

When the dust storms hit in AZ so does the humidity. Before you know it, you have mud butt of the wrong kind and it proceeds to chafing like no one's supposed to ever know.

Anti-Monkey Butt to the rescue LOL

BB -

Remind me to never dump your backvac out, ok? :)

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way out where only the lonely go...a hole is fine. But, the BLM and forrest nazis are getting tired of seeing yankee S*&^t all over the land...there are rules about waste disposal...

A five gallon bucket and snap-on toilet lid; a supply of good plastic bags and some kitty-litter will solve the problem and provide a little more comfort for us weak kneed sissys...

If possible I dig a hole and burn the contents to aid in returning the waste to the earth...if that is not an option I throw it in the trash and send it to the dump with the real kitty waste/litter...

fred

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Years ago out prospecting. We were joined by some city slickers. One of which was a real know-it-all. Every time anyone raised a subject, he bragged about shooting bigger deer, elk, bear, caught bigger fish, found more gold, on & on. Hiking along, that guy had to take a dump. I watched him walk off the trail into the bushes to do so. After he did his dump, he walked back to the trail. I could not help myself. I told him you must be a real tough sumbitch. He asked why do you say that? My reply was: “because I have never in my life seen anyone intentionally wipe their ass with poison oak before“.

Beer spray all over the laptop with that one... I swear I should know better by now... :ROFL:

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Years ago A fella I knew ditched work with his neighbors wife. They went out to topanga canyon(LA) for some naked fun'n'the sun and had 1 heck of a time(both of them really) explaining how they both came down with poison oak on their private parts at the same exact time to their respective spouses.....hahahah soooo busted-John

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